Requests and Updates for 12/02

Requests
==
+ Focus on the path God has for me, not the path I have for me
+ Diligence in finishing the semester strong
+ Hunger and thirst for prayer and His word


Updates
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It's been a rough few weeks. I've been in kind of a rut where I don't feel like I want to do anything. And if you look closely, it may look a bit like depression. But it's all part of the natural ebb and flow of life.

I realized that I need to be creative in order to be really energized. After I finished Jeff & Nancy's music video, I was on such an emotional high that there was no where else to go. And without a creative outlet, the rest of my emotions just kind of petered out.

The phone interview with Glenn went well. And it seems like a place that I would like to intern at. The problem is raising funds. It would cost about 1500 /month just to be a part of InterVarsity. So, we're looking at about 6000 after all's been tallied up.

As I contemplated about my future in bed, something clicked. I don't want to be a big hot shot director. My heart is in ministry, specifically, the creative arts. I've been wrestling with how to produce documentaries on topics of social justice and still make a living. I have to say, I've been kind of distracted by Hollywood. This is not to say that it's not a path, and if the opportunity arises, I'll definitely take it. But God brought my attention back into focus. It's about His people and reintroducing the wonder and joy of the arts to the Church.

If that's the direction I want to go, then maybe an internship at 2100 may not be the best thing for me. I might be better off looking to intern at a church that is at the cutting edge of the arts. I don't know how easy this would be to get, but all's possible with God, right? ;)

This doesn't really set me on a different direction. It's more like filling in the gaps. Now, it's just a matter of letting God open the doors to take me where He wants me to be.

More immediately, I want to try and meet with Susan, the Creative Arts director at Metro. I have a vision for it and would love to see the arts thrive at Metro.

I've also been struggling with my place at Metro. As much as I love it as a church, I feel like I haven't brought much value yet. This might be my eager eyed millenialness, one of my own personal demons, or a carry over from when I was in the world of corporate. But I feel like I need to perform. Then again, it may just be new job jitters. Or it may just be the school mentality of being graded.

School is going to wrap in about 2 weeks. That means final exams, papers, and presentations. Because of the rut, I didn't get any real work done over Thanksgiving. That just means I have to work harder and spend my time more wisely. Staying up 'til 4:30 AM would not fit the bill.

In that schedule, I need to fit God. I need to be a lot more deliberate and disciplined about spending time with Jesus. I'm thankful that He manages to find me every Tuesday morning, even if it does wreak havoc on my sleep schedule.